December 29...the BIG day!!

My doctor told me yesterday that he would induce me on December 29. Yikes…some how putting an actual “birth” day on Sophie makes this whole thing even more factual! To me becoming a mother has been a process. Just like getting married was. It becomes realistic in stages. Well, the doctor telling me that he was going to induce me really brought it home! It is so exciting, nerve wracking, and so many other emotions – which let me tell you – the emotions have been flowing!! I am still not 100% sure that I will be induced. I am going to do some thorough research before I make my final decision. There is no way I would ever want to put her at higher risk for complications. The good thing is that I trust my doctors (They did my surgery last October and were tremendous during that whole ordeal!) and do not think that they would be doing this if it would be potentially harmful to the baby or me. I still am going to research it because I don’t think that it is wise to trust blindly either. I need to know for myself that she will be ok if they were to induce me early. So we shall see…

The first big item for Sophie came yesterday…her stroller and car seat…YAY! It’s so cute! The car seat is heavy though! I am going to have some guns carrying the seat AND her! Below are pictures of Joe putting together the first of many things for Sophie! I think that he was just as excited to put it together as I was to get it; which says something because my husband isn’t one to get excited about many things. Well, he does get excited; he just isn’t one to show it (probably because he has to keep me from getting too ecstatic about things :-)!!). However, he has been so outwardly excited about Sophie! It’s been great to watch! He has going to be an amazing father!

Working hard...Ok, so it wasn't that hard to put together :-)

Does he not look like such a proud daddy!

I thought I would include a picture of the car seat...the stroller has the same green bubbles. We wanted to get a car seat that we could use with the next baby too, so we had to go with one that would work for a girl and a boy!

Reminiscing

My work is either INSANELY busy or not! Today has been a not so busy day. I started looking through old files deciding which ones I needed to keep and which ones to delete. Since I won't be at my job for much longer I am trying to do some organizing. While tidying up I came across pictures of my first wedding dress. I had two for those of you who don't know...Long story short, I ended up having to to exchange my dress for another one. THANKFULLY they actually let me exchange it!! As most girls know wedding boutiques NEVER make exchanges. This was totally a God thing!! I must say it truly was one of the most personal experiences that I've ever had with God. If I were to ever write a book it would be about my wedding dress! Anywho...here are pictures of my first wedding dress. I'll also throw in the actual dress that I wore. The dress that I ended up with was absolutely my dream dress!!

I kept that veil...

The whole reason I liked the dress was this bow...

This is the dress I actually wore, Obviously :-) Sorry for the poor quality...for some reason I'm not finding my professional pictures

Where is the sunshine

So today has not been the best of days. It started off by me opening my email and finding out that I had not won the most fabulous diaper bag ever! I’ll start from the beginning of the story. I LOVE Kate Spade bags! Oh, they are just the most beautiful bags in the world I think! So my mom told me that she would get me a Kate Spade diaper bag. I was ecstatic to say the least. I found one that I loved. It was a little boyish, which was perfect since I felt that I was having a boy, Ha! When I found out that we were having a girl I set out on a quest to find a new Kate Spade diaper bag. Since I am a very girly girl, I wanted to have a girly diaper bag (especially since we are having Sophie!!). Surprisingly I could not find a Kate Spade diaper bag that really fit what I was looking for. I did not have specifics of what I wanted, but I knew that I would know it when I saw it. Well, I am starting to become a little bit of an ebay-holic. I decided to browse the Kate Spade diaper bags just to see what they had. Low and behold…I had found THE diaper bag. AND to make things even better it was at a great price since it was on ebay! I put a bid on it immediately (Well, immediately after calling my mom to tell her that I had found the perfect diaper bag)! Since we were still 5 days out from the end of the bidding I just knew that the price would sky rocket since it was such a cool bag! IT DIDN’T!!! The bag stayed at the price the whole time…Well, up until at least an hour before the bidding ending, which was when I decided to go to bed. I had a feeling that I should stay up just in case, but as I have mentioned in other posts, sleep has become the most important thing to me these days so I went on to bed. I was so excited to check my email this morning that I could barely stand it!! I opened my email and saw that I had been outbid by $2.50. TWO DOLLARS AND FIFTY CENTS!!! Being the pregnant woman that I am I immediately started crying! I know that this is such a silly thing to cry about which made me cry harder! It was a mess! Luckily, I slipped into my bosses office (he wasn’t in yet, THANK THE LORD!!) so that I would not have to explain to any one that I was crying over a diaper bag. I guess it just was not meant to be! I called Joe, and since he is a boy, he did not understand the big deal. “The prices always goes up at the end of the bid, so what did you expect?” he asked. Needless to say this did not help matters…I went back to the bosses’ office to cry some more. The fact that the weather outside is over cast does not help...what a dreary day all around! Below are pictures of the magnificent diaper bag.

I have to do what?!

It has really started to sink in that this baby has to come out, and the time for this to happen is approaching rather quickly!! This weekend Joe and I went to a friend’s wedding and our table at the reception was literally ALL pregnant women and their husbands. Two of these women already had one child, so they had been through the whole birthing thing. Julie Johnson – who is the CUTEST pregnant woman – and I are pregnant with our first. The two pros started telling about their labor experiences with their first child. This is when it hit me like a ton of bricks that this baby in me was going to go out…no matter what, and most likely would be on her on timing, not mine. Oh dear!! I am beginning to get very nervous! From what I hear about labor there is no way to know how it will go. You can plan and plan, but it will probably go the opposite way of what you planned. Have I mentioned that I’m a planner? That I like to know exactly how things are going to go?! Yeah, apparently this is the worst type of personality to have when it comes to labor…Perfect! I think the fact that there is no way for me to know precisely what is going to happen is what freaks me out the most. I don’t know how long I’ll be in labor, where I’ll be when it begins, will she be sunny side up, will I need an emergency c-section, etc. etc. etc. There are so many unknowns! It’s a bit overwhelming to think about. A friend told me that somehow your body just takes over and your entire focus is on that baby and what you have to do to help it out. This brings me some comfort; knowing that God has given us the innate instinct to have babies! From talking to friends and my doctor the best thing to do is be prepared for anything to happen. As soon as I find out how to do that I’ll be set.

I went to the doctor yesterday and Sophie is healthy as a horse (and kicking like one too!!). Her heart beat is strong and she measures right on target! Can I just tell you the complete dread I feel to step on that scale at the doctor’s office!! It’s torture, absolute torture! I only gained 3 pounds though (in the last 4 weeks, not the whole pregnancy)…YAY! It’s still very difficult to see the number that I saw on the scale. Never in my life have I ever seen those numbers when I stepped on a scale. Even though the doctor says I’m doing good with my weight it is challenging to see the changes going on with my body. I have to keep reminding myself that I am pregnant, and that these things are going to happen. The hormones don’t help though! I’ve cried more in the last month than I had in a year pre-pregnancy!

7 months?!?!

Yesterday I entered my third trimester. I truly can not believe that I am 28 weeks!! (My doctor says that I'm seven months, but I think technically I'm 6 1/2 months.) It feels like just yesterday I was holding the stick in my hand in utter disbelief! I'll recap the story of that fateful night for those who have not heard it...

To start off with I had noticed that I was experiencing an exhaustion that I had never experienced in my life!! I had actually just told my mom to please pray for me because I thought something was wrong with me because I was exhausted in a way that I had never been before. Of course, this worried my mother. Well, I then realized that I was a couple days late. It was a Tuesday morning when I text Joe to tell him that I was late. He said not to worry about it, but if I had not started by Thursday we would go get a pregnancy test. I knew he was right, I shouldn't worry about it. Well, as the day progressed I became more and more preoccupied with the fact that I STILL had not started, so I decided on the way home to get a test. Joe was studying for a big final that he had the next day so I went on to take the test. Never in my life to I expect what I was about to see...it was POSITIVE. I came flying out of the bath room, ran into Joe's office, and just stood there looking like a wild animal I'm sure! Joe's eye got huge and he just said, "Really?" I immediately said, "I've got to call my mother." Side note...I think it's funny how even though I'm 24 years old I still think that my mother has the answers to everything! I hope Sophie feels like that with me :-)! Back to the story...when she picked up I didn't even bother to say hello. I went straight into, "Mom, how accurate are pregnancy tests?" She said, "Umm...pretty accurate. Why?" "Because I just took one and it's positive" Which I then proceeded to burst out in tears while she laughed hysterically. I told her to stop laughing, it wasn't funny. I spent the rest of the night between going in between laughter and tears.

It's funny looking back on that now!! Obviously, Sophie was unexpected,but I wouldn't trade this timing for anything in the world! Because of all the female problems I had I was scared to death that I wouldn't be able to have children. I prayed that God would allow me to them! That's why I treasure this opportunity! I didn't know if I would ever have it. Because of this I get really fired up when a few people have said something about it being an accident. One woman even went as far as to say that her son and daughter in law where taking all the right precautions so that they wouldn't become pregnant. Let me tell you right now it took all the restraint I could muster not to give her a piece of my mind!! First of all, God doesn't create accidents and we Christians should be the first to defend this, Secondly, we never know what people have in their hearts (for instance, I had the fear that I would never have children), and thirdly, Joe and I did take proper precautions. God just knew that it was time for Sophie to come into being!! As you can see I feel very passionate about this :-)!

Last night I had a dream that I had the baby, but it turned out to be boy in stead. Of Lord, I would die if this happened!! Could you imagine?! Poor child would have a very girly room to come home to! I actually said that in my dream. However, I will glady welcome the four hour labor that I had in my dream :-)!

Did you know...

My friend Erica did this survey and it seemed really fun!

Attached or Single? Attached to Joe Q

Best Friend? Joe, of course, my sister, Sarah Holland

Cake or Pie? Coconut Creme Pie!! Besides that I would prefer cake

Day of Choice? Friday...I have the day off, so I can sleep in, clean, and have time to myself

Essential Item? Perfume/Good smelling lotion...some how after induction I became obessed with smelling good. Can't think of a reason why ;-)

Flavor of Ice Cream? Mint Oreo...I just discovered this this summer...it's so YUMMY!!

Gummy Bears or Worms? I'm not really a big fan of either.

Indulgences? Once again I would have to go back to the lotion thing. I have WAY TOO MUCH of this stuff. Seriously, my lotions take up and entire cabinet on our bathroom.

January or July? January...it's our anniversary and due date of Sophie. Plus, it's just way too hot in July to actually enjoy it!

Last Movie I saw in a Theater? I think it was the Batman movie

Middle Name? Renea

Number of Siblings? 1 sister

Oranges or Apples? That's a hard one...if I had to pick one I would apples because it's easier to eat.

Phobia or Fear? Sharks. I won't even look at a picture of one. And I definitely DO NOT EVER go swimming in the ocean! It was so bad that when I was little I would freak myself out even when I was in the swimming pool...I have a VERY active imagination!!!

Quote? Below are three of my favorites...they are actually my goals in life :-)

"To be a witness to their pain"

"If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain. If I can ease one life the aching, or cool one pain, or help one fainting robin unto his nest again, I shall not live in vain." -Emily Dickinson

"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.' You must do the thing you think you cannot do."Eleanor Roosevelt

Reason to Smile? Oh lots of things...feeling Sophie move, when my husband walks in the door from being gone all day, great shoes, I could go on and on!

Season? Fall in TN! I miss it SO much!! I would move just to have Fall in TN!

Tag five more: Sissy, Sarah, Jen P, Erica, and Cindy.

Unknown Fact About Me? This is such a "knowing your class question"...I stuck a bead in my ear when I was 3 and had to have it surgically removed.

Worst Habit? Cracking my knuckles. I'm trying very hard to stop

Xrays or Ultrasounds? Either

Your favorite Food? This is never a good question for a pregnant woman! I would have to say Mexican, Italian, and anything Southern (ex. Fried Chicken, Dumplins, greens)

Good Bye Apt #303

Joe and I turned in our keys to the apartment last night. I thought that I would be a little more sad, but I wasn't. It probably had something to do with the fact that I was beyond over climbing three flights of stairs!! And that I was really hungry. Since I've been pregnant finding food when I'm hungry seems to trump everything else! Unfortunately, I was only able to get separate pictures of Joe and I at our apartment for the last time. I think that he would KILL me if I posted his picture because he is really sweaty from carrying out the last few items we had left in the apartment.

Good gracious...I've gotten big! Can you imagine what I'm going to look like at 9 months?!

So the past couple of days the pregnancy hormones have REALLY kicked in! I have had a great pregnancy! I would even call it close to perfect. Well, that quickly came to an end. Don’t get my wrong; I know that I am still incredible lucky because it could be a lot worse, but the past couple of days I have been miserable. Every part of my body aches and other parts throb! I’m exhausted because I can’t sleep through the night anymore. Plus, my hormones have been all over the place. Last night I started bawling because I hurt so terribly and my knees started to swell. Who know knees could swell?! Luckily, it wasn’t too noticeable. No one besides me or Joe would probably even notice. However, it did make matters worse that Joe COULD tell that my knees indeed did look “a little thicker than normal” as he so delicately put it. Oh the joys of pregnancy! Plus, my clothes don’t fit. Up until this point I’ve been able to wear my regular clothes. Then the other weekend I discovered that NOTHING fit! Eeeshh…I’m a mess! I think that I should stop this venting/ranting session before things get really gruesome!